Hold On

July 5, 2025

I grew up in San Diego. When I was a kid I always loved playing in the waves!  I can close my eyes and relive it now. I feel the power of the water crashing over my head and swirling around my hair. I hear the roaring water in my ears after I take a breath and dip under a wave. I come up for air, smell the salt water and feel it burning my eyes. The ocean is exciting. And beautiful. But it can also be dangerous. 

My dad liked to “bodysurf,” meaning catching a wave just as it broke and riding it in to shore, without a surfboard or boogie board. He would have to position himself in the right place, after noticing where the waves were breaking. Then when he’d see a potential wave coming, he would start swimming towards shore just before the wave hit him, and then stretch his arms out above his head and straighten his body flat like a board. With luck, the wave would pick him up and he could enjoy the thrill of riding the wave as it carried him along until he got to the shallows. He would then pop up out of the water smiling. 

When I was little he would let me ride on his back while he bodysurfed. He would tell me to hold tight to his shoulders and then he would do his thing and catch a wave, and together we would glide along like dolphins in the churning wave. We would come up breathless and smiling with me clinging to his back. He was so strong. I was so little. 

But I remember a time when we didn’t come up smiling. The sun was warm, the salt spray in my face as a rode piggy back while my dad walked out deeper towards the waves. Then he saw a wave coming. It was a big one. It was building and swelling so far above our heads, and he called out, “Hang on, Chrissy!” and he began swimming to catch the wave, his strong arms pounding the water. 

The wave broke over our backs with fierce anger, and instead of “catching” the wave and riding it in like a board, we were forced deep under the water, tumbling and swirling, not knowing which way was up. It terrified me! I was powerless against this mighty ocean! I held onto my dad with every bit of strength I had as the water pummeled us. We couldn’t get out. Then we started banging against the sand as it got shallower, and there were rocks on the shore that seemed to hit every bony kneecap, elbow or ankle. And I couldn’t breathe! 

And suddenly we rolled onto the shore, coughing and aching. I was shaking in fear and relief, and my dad put his arms around me and helped me stand. My mom came running down the beach and my dad described how we had been victimized by the wave that was supposed to be our joy. 

I don’t know if I ever went bodysurfing with my dad again. I can’t remember. But what I do remember is that when something awful and unexpected happened, I just held onto my dad. In the swirling, raging, powerful sea, he was all I had. But he was enough. 

I don’t know why that incident came to mind this afternoon. I think it was God. I haven’t thought of that in ages! But today I was lying in the hammock praying, and I was pondering what my future might hold. I don’t know what may be in store. I bet there is a whole lot of wonderful in my future. But I bet there is some awful too. And I thought of Job in the Bible and how God allowed him to lose everything he held dear (family, wealth, health), because Satan claimed that Job only followed God because everything in Job’s life was so wonderful. So God allowed Satan to test Job. (See Job chapters 1-2). And I wondered if God will ever test me in any similar way. And the unknown scares me!

But then I promised God that I will always be His girl, and that I will follow Him no matter what comes. I know that what I can always be sure of is that He is with me. Just like I held tight to my dad’s shoulders as the ocean crashed over us and held us under, I can hold tightly to God no matter what may crash over me. And He will pick me up off the shore and help me stand up again when it’s over. He is the best father!

Deuteronomy 3:6

“Be strong and courageous. Do not fear or be in dread of them, for it is the LORD your God who goes with you. He will not leave you nor forsake you.”

Isaiah 43:2

"When you pass through the waters, I will be with you; and when you pass through the rivers, they will not sweep over you. When you walk through the fire, you will not be burned; the flames will not set you ablaze."